For the past few months.
We play a game called the two week wait.
For the first few days of the two week wait, we keep on keepin’ on. In the hopes or understanding the possibility that I could ovulate later than the standard 14 day assumption.
I keep taking my basal body temps every morning, bright and early.
I’m 8 days dpo right now, according to fertility calendar, but who knows. I could be anwhere from 6 days to 18 days. It’s a tricky science.
It’s discouraging. Last month I had a few days of faint positive. Then nothing. Then 5 days late I started bleeding. My beta blood tests showed at chemical pregnancy. A loss at less than 5 weeks.
I’m okay. We’re okay. It’s just frustrating. There are energy issues for Bill, having sex every day for an extended period of time just isn’t possible. There are weight issues for me, I’m still working on that, I’d like to get down at least another 20lbs before January 1.
Then there’s the 4 month gap where we have to take a break between January and April because of a trip that is planned for the fall. Can’t risk travelling around a due date or when travellers insurance won’t cover a pregnancy. That’s frustrating and puts a little pressure on us in December.
Please don’t tell me it will happen when it happens… or if it’s meant to be it will happen. Those are the words of someone who has never spent a longer period of time conceiving.
Those are the words of someone who doesn’t get it.